DUMBGEONS & DRAGONS

Season 2 • May 11, 2022

E121 - This is Grade A Bologna!

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Transcript

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previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.

am i dead right now because i kind of feel like i may should have had have been

can nobody go in the creek i will not all right there's two things that we can do we can go across

the river and go to what could possibly be the mirror side of things or we can do what

agoth said before and it's like maybe this is like the fae realm and we got to walk away

from that mountain there has been like an one new development there's been a thing what thing

well agoth maybe found some tracks and you guys are down here just doing collaborating okay well

i'm just gonna pop down the hole you just just wait here okay did you give us your name it

just yeah for politeness yeah of course sorry madam are madam are no not madam are madam are

madam are it sure sounded like he said madam are you feel your head hit the dirt below you all

and then you wake up back in the clearing well you guys left well the night time came and then we

were just brought us back here so you want to go to the mountain there's like these crackling

noises that are moving along the stones and madam are is getting increasingly nervous the

further you're walking in there's only one way to no push up and uh sully runs and jumps

into the black goo i just just walk into it some more fuck it can't just let my bud be in there

so i'll like link arms with uh flamacanth and we'll skip into the the goop this massive brain

that begins emanating this like purple black light and these tentacles begin to lift up

and out of this goo and from high up you feel the presence of different creatures or figures

looming over top of you

welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons i'm your dungeon master rust more he him also with

me today is carla max dead see her playing glim also see her and tom lard he him uh and

i'm playing mood who also goes by he him and Amy More yeah she her and i will be playing

sullivan slight he him and christen Flemmons hello hello i am once again playing agath

we're both she heard excellent we're all here we've all checked in kept it simple

something else is gonna happen no shenanigans it's moist in the dark room we're in

oh we we're not there yet we haven't said play it russ counted weird and it threw me

off so i only could say my name that's why there was no shenanigans because he said one two four

and i was like oh no that's all it takes man it was really interesting to see everybody's

eyes just do one of these little side like did he mean to do that my brain went that's

something you learned at that improv class that he was going to the improv class that's

yeah all those kids taught him that thing there that's right hey you can join us at Patreon where

we do uh improv shows we do yeah we do live shows and they're a lot of fun and we would

love to have you there Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast and when you are a patron you

get an episode dedicated to you like today's patron wyatt bartlett thanks wyatt thank you

wyatt thanks wyatt you're the best and now after you've joined us there Patreon.com slash

dumb dragon cast fuck it let's play

as previously mentioned it's a dark humid place it was quite warm

in the middle there's this huge bubbling vat of this viscous blackish almost with this like

purple iridescent light coming up and off of it you have the sense that you're

being watched by creatures high above in this place but what your eye is drawn to

immediately as you enter is this massive brain in the center of this lake before you

giant tentacles are moving their way up and out of it towards you everybody make

a constitution saving throw please can we just feel like you're automatically going to be the

dumbest one in the room 15 oh wow i did not realize i lied intelligence oh okay oh no come

on ross the same for me yeah me too 17 i went from a 26 to a 17 i went from a 14 to a 9

wow okay so nobody above a 17 i think is what i heard there yes correct uh yeah i got 17

okay great is it yeah it's really cool for who for that giant brain as you step through

and you're trying to your eyes are trying to adjust and you're seeing this before you this

wave of energy blasts out towards all of you and you're all going to take 32 psychic damage

and be stunned for one minute oh welcome to tonight's game i feel like it just ended

yeah so for those playing the home game a stunned creature is incapacitated

can't move and can speak only falteringly the creature automatically fails strength and

dexterity saving throws attack rolls against the creature have advantage so like i feel like

that's just how sully talks anyway so is it the save can be attempted again at the end of

each of your turns let's roll for initiative and stick to an order for this one because

nobody's saying anything to throw to somebody else for this one 12 18 14 10 uh and we'll roll

Flamikinskins and matamar in there too how did they do against this giant brain oh right

they're saves that's uh matamar failed miserably cool seven uh Flamikinskins got a 13 on the die

saving throw no 15 uh so also failed that's a 17 for Flamikinskins and a one for matamar

oh you all fall to the ground as you can see that this brain is beginning to move towards

you and up high up above in this in this cavern you see floating down towards you

are several everybody make a

um a nature or arcana roll i hate all my dice right now wow real bad all of them feel bad

16 oh that's a two four fuck that dice 19 moot and glim you recognize these creatures

as uh perhaps something you've read about in your books because you're both well read

individuals so many books um as mind flares oh kind of figured that's where the road we were

going down was going to end up it looks like a mind flayer and walks like a mind flayer

and it has a giant brain as a companion this is a bad uh heaven place this is bad

this is not the celestial glim inhibition right like what the fuck is this little

pocket hell dimension doing here in the supposedly wonderful place

yeah you know um yeah so the mind flares are gonna come down um how many how many uh there are

three of them and you also hear soft not soft what's the word for them i don't know but

what are they doing because i want to envision them doing it softly me too they're walking

or crawling along the walls of this cavern they are these giant toad-like spine lizard-like

probably more likely spined creatures and they are like their claws are piercing into the

stone as they are surrounding you and your group so they're not killing us with their song

like hey it's gonna be okay you guys

you guys cool yeah we're cool

one of the mind flayers uh the closest one is going to move down how long is a minute

how much damage are we taking 10 rounds

holy shit should i have rolled for for uh racks yeah roll for racks that could be a late game

like racks rags save us you're like one two three and he's he was like at the back being

like he's on the outside ear up to the weird barrier so that's a natural 20 oh yeah he's

gonna fucking save the day okay so how i think this is gonna work uh is uh so you all mind

blasted racks kind of comes through with the at the like the tail end of that and saves and

then all of these things begin to come down so let's give racks a turn before anything else

happens what is racks going to do are any of the soft horrible creatures like sort of in

the same area in that he might be able to hit them in a 15-foot cone together the soft ones

are up on the walls so most one maybe two maybe one mind flayer and one weird thing together is

that uh probably not the mind flayer okay they're up they're levitating in the air

it's quite high up all right well he'll try and catch two in a poison breath cone

okay i guess i'll get that out there right out of the gate so they have to make a constitution

saving throw 18 for one and a natural 20 oh for fuck's sake it's a dc 11 okay

no need to overdo it i wanted racks to save the day 11 12 13 i don't know did you

14 16 17 so 17 points of poison damage halved i guess since they saved they saved they shriek out

as they're batting away at the gas around them their back claws digging further into the stone

to prevent them from falling the mind flayers are going to be up and racks i'm going to need

to make another intelligence saving throw from one of these mind flayers he's so smart

smart oh that's the 17 on the dice i don't remember what his intelligence score is

clearly a plus five i think he's so smart yeah he saved um so he's still gonna take 11 psychic

damage but will not be stunned as the as the tentacles are beginning to move their way out

of this pool and these mind flayers are moving down closer these these lizard creatures are now

encircling closer to racks glim it is your turn so at the end of your turn you can save

try to save again intelligence unless you can do something without moving speaking how low are

the mind flayers now probably 30 feet above yes they are he's like i mean 50 50 55 30 times

then i'm going to try and uh blast them blast one however many are in my in my radius with my

fire breath i don't need to really move to do that i don't think just open my mouth is that

acceptable how did you fall how did you fall on her back obviously straight on my back i mean

i'll give you on you on your back head straight up in the air sure just like i did a trust fall

but there was no one there yeah okay love it you were expecting one of us to be behind

we let you down again so sorry uh great uh it or they need to make a deck save

that's a 19 for one of them and an 11 for the other so one gets full damage and one

gets half damage of 16 is full so the one that rolled the 19 will take eight and that's

fire damage and if i can't move i probably can't do anything else i have two attacks but i don't

have instant refresh fire breath so uh i could just spit that's pretty rude you know what would

happen is it would spit and it would fall back down on your own face yeah but also you're

right glim would never oh that's a nine roll to three okay you're still incapacitated

okay here we go here's this flash of light that a flash of energy uh that waves out from the pool

and one of these creatures crawling along the wall is is struck by it and it gets this like

burst of speed as it's going to move to it and two of its friends are going to move to

attack racks with their claws uh one got a natural 20 got a seven and one got a 11 no

okay so the natural 20 will hit 17 slashing damage rude because you said soft i know you

corrected yourself but it was in my brain already so what i am picturing these creatures is like

giant beanie babies but with big mean claws and his big mean claws yeah that's exactly it yep so

cute but also not cute very bad but probably really collectible very expensive absolutely

Flamikins kin's turn

verbal somatic verbal somatic verbal somatic verbal somatic

uh oh some no somatic um looking for anything any no nothing uh she's got nothing so she's

gonna try and save and she does not oh no sully uh can i move my arms no guys i like sully has

so much in his features and traits that i like have not ever been able to use or remember

it's there yeah that is just not helpful right now as i'm trying to look through it

like maybe had i had read through it before and and and and done uncanny dodge i don't think he

can do anything he's got to move for absolutely everything he does so i guess i'm just gonna roll

for my intelligence intelligence yeah that is a 21 you sparkly dices back in the game folks

as you're struggling to find something to do you manage to you you suddenly feel feeling

coming back sense feeling coming back in your extremities and you are no longer incapacitated

but you cannot do anything until your next turn i can feel my feelings you guys but

that's not the voice of sullivan light who's this guy i thought he was just like just still

coming too and that's why he yeah yeah the second mind flayer is going to be uh moving

down towards who has the highest intelligence amongst the group i have 13 17 negative one or

sorry eight which i mean yeah also eight okay so glim highest intelligence unless

flamingans has higher i don't which would shock everyone let's see if we can shock everyone

11 nope not gonna shock anybody today uh going to move down towards glim who cannot move

and will attempt a tentacle attack

which is gonna be a parking tentacle attack doc doesn't like that no it's terrible uh 22

to attack as it is hovering above your face and you see these tentacles grappling out

towards you you're gonna take 15 psychic damage and you are grappled towards your face

as it's suctioning into the into your your i don't want to say face again but it's your face

so you can escape with a dc's 15 strength save escape the grapple but you can't move

i double can't move you double can't but you can't move so you can't do that

yeah and make a dc 15 intelligent now you're already stunned so it doesn't matter

hold on doesn't it hold on go back to that where it says what the stunt is incapacity can't move

can speak only faltering automatically fails strength and dexterity so yeah you can't break

out until you can get rid of the stunt oh yeah and all the attacks on us have advantage

yeah well because you can't move this is baloney it doesn't wear off if they do any

like damage to us or anything this is grade a baloney grade a this is grade a baloney his

glim discovering in this moment she has a tentacle kink i don't know oh well she can't

she can't verbalize it she's tentacles she can either confirm nor deny wrapping around her face

right now moot what you got baby uh who that's good question good question russ

uh what i do have is a little feature called subtle spell in my metamagic okay which enables

me to spend a sorcery point and i can cast a spell without any somatic or verbal components

booyah look he's reading a sheet finally someone has something good

about damn time to be perfectly honest with you

i wish i could cast uh one of my spells but i need a material for it and i don't think it's

within the realm of possibility that i landed with it in my hands what's the material

just tell me yes or no rather what's the material tom i mean a little bit of

sulfur that's all you have a false tooth with sulfur in it that you bite down on and a little

ball of like that's all okay okay another tooth all your teeth are fake just those two things

that's all it's getting a little unreasonable tom it's getting a little unreasonable could have

justified sulfur like along the floors of the walls but now you're adding a secondary

cave are there i mean that's living caves it's that's true uh okay odds there's bat guano

that's what you need yeah uh i don't yeah not evens uh so there's no bat you can get sulfur

but no bat all the baby things have eaten the bats eaten the bats yeah fair uh i will

go to plan uh plan b um i'm still doing the meta magic of course uh and i will cast eldrick blast

okay uh at the uh thing that's uh getting up in in glim's grill okay that's nice all right so

i have four beams all going towards the same one yep all four will be focused on this all

right uh first of the four is a 23 uh yes uh this one's a 27 uh yeah uh a 28 how does tom roll so

good and an 18 thanks amy why the plus 10 to the to the oh okay well those are still good

everything beat armor class so you've got four hits going at this one mine flare oh fuck up

this mine flare i don't know how tough these things are so i'm just throwing everything i have

at it your friend glim appreciates it well sometimes glim needs a little bit of help or

you're interrupting something really special it could go either way we're not sure either way

you don't know okay so we've got a zero on the die so that's uh 10 on the first one uh 17 uh

21 and 27 so 27 force damage so with that 27 force damage from your prone uh incapacitated

position these four bolts of eldrick blast go out where do they come from great question i'll

say my cron no there's only one right answer and you nailed it yeah we all knew it was crotch

yeah we did yep

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soaring through the air they strike into this mine flare who releases its tentacled grip

and is blasted back into the air as it is levitating how many feet does it get blasted

back it gets blasted back 15 feet uh smooth oh do i get to save to see if i can beat this

thing uh that's a nine so no you do not um the third mine flayer is going to move towards you

moot oh good your destructive crotch and with advantage good thing because the god of crit

fails so that's gonna be a 26 to hit your face just barely i knew it yeah i high face

rolls where's a helmet all the time something we haven't really talked about the doctor

said it was for my own good going to be 20 psychic damage all right and seeing as you

are already stunned uh you are now grappled i thought you were gonna say i was super stunned

you are super stunned um okay so you are stunned uh with a tentacular mine flare on your face

can you roll me a wild magic surge please oh i sure can i think we're at a if i remember

correctly we're at like an eight uh well that's a four so either way we are under that bar okay

here we go wild magic surge roll me at percentile dice oh my god i hope the angry unicorn comes

back i do and i hope we can maybe get it on our side if only because like it wants to

like beat the shit out of us itself that it'll help it's the one that wants to finish us off

not these fucking assholes right okay uh that is a 006 so six russ you feel these tentacles wrap

around your face and there's like this alien like teeth mouth beginning to uh take a chomp

out of your face and for everybody they hear like this this like suction this

and moot's gone and the the mind flayer like buries into the ground and like levitates back

up and is looking around like there's these like sounds towards the other ones and uh we

will find out where mood is on his next turn fantastic a goth there is absolutely nothing

i can do until i beat this done so i guess i will just fast forward to that part okay

uh intelligence saving throw please i'm gonna use one of my features uh which one is it

it's one about saving throws that i should use the first time indomitable indomitable

um reroll saving throw that you fail okay come on come on join me i can't save the day

well it's just not possible the good news is it's better the bad news is it's a 12 minus one

oh these are real rough rough dc to beat for you now is it yeah so that i'm gonna i'm gonna

go to limb and say that's a no that's a no yeah that's a no for uh just to keep it

just to keep it above board 18 is the number everybody has to be wow yeah well i mean i had

17 the first time and did not get it so i kind of figured it was in that range um i'm gonna

i'll see in a minute um does racks get to like hit something with its with his hooves

in the meantime uh yeah matamar is gonna go first to see if he saves because he does not

have anything on him and is not a magical caster he does not save he's just

uh just incoherently sobbing uh yeah um so yeah racks's turn okay i guess i will reroll

to i roll to see if i recharge the poison breath that is a no so can there are three of the

the soft clawed creatures on him yeah all right um hooves it is gonna hit one of them

oh that's a natural 20 again so a 26 see racks can fucking roll yeah i can't

that'll be instead of 2d8 4d8 21 plus um four 25 legendary damage plus 2d6 poison damage so

46 poison damage whoa yes um uh 12 13 poison damage yeah so 26 so 29 total 39 total damage

uh so racks that's so much that's just that's a good amount that's a beefy horse you got

going on there horse is fucking saving the day this is the horse uh but like scarier but like

from from tangled exactly uh horse begins bucking hooves going wild at these these creatures

and kicks one of them square in the chest and like you hear the bones cave in the muscle and

like crush in around it as it's blasted back this huge plume of poison gas following it

it hits into two others which like crushes them with the force behind on the wall

and the three of them crumple uh to the ground lifeless lifeless nice took out three they were

once so full of life snuffed out in their prime slowly slowly feeling better and you just

hear from the side weak claps does like a dramatic main toss yeah uh the brain

uh it's going to make a psychic what about uh flammokins and uh mademar there mademar just

failed flammokins also failed flammokins was after all right there was lots of looks for um

for spells that didn't require verbal oh that's right sorry yeah um yeah it was so memorable

ouch well i was doing the same thing ross i was like fuck everything on my list i was like

wait a minute wait a minute special something glim make a saving throw intelligence please

it's going well nine oh nine i have a good plus on intelligence but i rolled a three

get rid of that dice gotta start rotating through one of the tentacles from the pool

has like made its way over to you and it like begins wrapping itself around you and lifting

you up and you feel this psychic connection and it's like turning you towards this

this brain in the middle of this giant pool as it's pulling you towards it and it says

in your mind you are a pawn of mine now and he turns i'm sorry how many times does this

have to happen to carlisle so many times always mind control it senses senses highest intelligence

just does um uh puts you down and you feel compelled by this creature to begin attacking

your friends on your turn you cannot do anything until that point but i'm stunned so i can't

right oh that's true for a whole minute and she's been failing all those saves that's

true yeah so i suppose you are stunned how does that work we're using our rules

are well i mean you can't like unhurt a person that you hurt right so i mean it blasted her so

and hurt her and and hurt her yeah yeah for a whole minute okay whole minute you got it it's

holding you up with this tentacle though not letting you fall down and i'm just staring at

me that's right begins moving your arms like grasping your sword in one hand

you're not really mind controlled you're just a puppet that's right one of the mind flares is

going to uh sully have you i haven't had my turn yet no no don't worry it's not your turn

for a while there's a lot of things happening here shit i have so many notes you guys notes

are so bad because it means there's a thousand creatures coming to kill us i have

not one note that just says tpk that's all the note says actually it's like nobody's gotten even

to talking character because we immediately were it's yeah well kristen said she she had a sore

throat so i'm like yeah don't worry it's fine don't worry and now we're all suffering because

of it that's right it's very contagious uh sully and racks need to make an intelligence

saving throw please but why because this mind player is mind blasting you with psychic energy

in a 60-foot cone but why because it's trying to catch everybody who's possibly 16 14 the 16 will

succeed 14 will not um sully you're going to take 11 psychic damage uh racks is going to

take 22 psychic damage and be stunned for one minute okey dokey uh does my uncanny dodge

work for mental attacks can i uncannily dodge a mind attack it just says when an attacker that

you can see hits you with an attack you can use your reaction to half the attacks damage against

you no because it is not an attack it's an area effect okay yeah all right so you have to

succeed seems like semantics if you ask me right but whatever look i'm just reading the

rules well there's your problem don't blame the dm blame the game that's right okay um so you

uh took some damage but you are you are no you're still not stunned oh good racks however is

stunned uh that's not good let's let's get i thought we're gonna partner up yeah

glim back to you okay you are facing your friends now yeah being held up by tentacles

being compelled to attack so see if your fire breath uh recharges please doesn't though right

does it carla no it does no no because you're rolling like shit tonight see it doesn't

yeah it's true okay uh she wouldn't lie it was a two actually why are you rolling like me

tonight carla i don't know it's not good um unless you want well i mean you can i can't

do anything else i looked in everything else is verbal uh then intelligent saving throw please

okay oh that's better maybe intelligent but for who carla it's better for who

oh you're right i'm 21 this is actually a bad roll uh you uh begin to get feeling back uh as

the tentacle releases you you now have full mobility for your next turn and are still

compelled by the brain uh how do i stop being compelled that's a good question

have a look that up um unimportant oh you can get a another saving throw oh so doesn't she get

to take that though at the end of this turn oh wait a second wait a second the target can

use an action on its turn to attempt to break the psychic link doing so uh with a successful dc

18 charisma saving throw okay do it so i proved my brain now let's see how cool

it's a two isn't it

so not cool i have such a good plus on charisma too but oh my god oh that's amazing

perfect great well glimpses just as cool as carla checks out

you have you moved or anything i have not yet done anything i know that's fine i would like

to do something uh flamingans is uh still saying verbal somatic verbal somatic but she's not

really saying that it's uh because she can't do anything either the she's worried she'll never

fuck her again now that racks is down the creatures along the walls have kind of backed

off and they're receding back up the walls but still uh still watching the scene below sully it

is your turn it is yep okay cool save the day save all of us i'm gonna do that um i am going

to use a feature of assassinate oh i've read my character sheet uh i have advantage on attack

rolls against any creature that hasn't taken a turn in oh in the combat yet everything's

taken a turn i mean there's some creatures that have kind of hung out on the walls

okay one moment please all the mind flares are levitating big brain is in the middle of

a giant weird vat pool if i all of a sudden popped up like really fast would i surprise it

like the big brain or like anything like anything what's what's your end goal here

what are you here's my here's my thing is it possible that while everyone else is being

targeted this whole time and after on my last turn it was such a long time ago that um i

maybe could have like barrel rolled like one roll like every every once in a while

to like just like slowly like move um to where i would like be able to like

pop up behind a mind flayer or like behind the brain or something uh well brain's in the

middle of a giant pool so you're not really popping up yeah i suppose popping up behind

mind flares are up in the air at least 15 feet okay so now what about one of the beanie babies

you get one of the beanie babies what i said they're up on the walls or maybe it could be

like an apocalypse now kind of scene where sully just like shows up out of the water dagger

in mouth like sure if you wanted if you want to do that i don't want to go in the

purple water i don't go in the water i don't want to get in the pool i don't want to get

in the pool okay um okay but i would like to surprise a beanie baby okay um and i'd like

to surprise it by shooting an arrow at it oh well you can shoot arrows at anything but i want

to surprise it because it previously thought i was incapacitated okay okay does that mean that

i could also surprise a mind flayer oh i figured you were trying to sneak up behind

but if you're trying to shoot like with a ranged attack like you can shoot anything right well like

i know but i also want to yeah you can surprise a mind flare by shooting it in wherever you

want to shoot it okay because i want to do death strike i don't know what that is okay

well when i yeah and we when it has like a caveat so when i attack and hit a creature so

that's the big i have to hit it um that is surprised it must make a con saving throw of

20 and on a failure i get to double the damage of my attack against it so i know i'm never gonna

roll a nat 20 but like guys this is a way i could get double damage okay yeah sure what do you want

to attack a mind flayer or the brain i want to attack a mind flayer because they're being real

dicks to my friends and putting their tentacles in their mouths so there's one that mood i just

assume it was in your mouth uh there's one that mood attacked for some some pretty decent

damage and then the other two were attacked by a glimpsed fire burn um i will do the one that

looks the though i'll do like a um just any one that's like yeah one that looks damaged

all right then the one that some tattered robes uh and i'm gonna hit it with my short bow okay

oh for 29 that's gonna hit excellent i have to succeed on a con save yes

uh and i'm i want to look yeah i win six plus one or five plus one six dice police

well only because like you know i'm not gonna take your surprise away

listeners at home amy made the face of faces at that

uh so i get double my double my my bubble okay so that is 12 okay at one of these minds

yeah scared you didn't know you motherfucker turns to you and let out this

sound towards you sorry what sound

yeah don't you forget it glimly you're just standing there for do do something cool uh one

of the the other one of the other mind flayers is going to try to recharge his blast which is not

going to do ah these these mind flayers are bad boys like they're bad boys yeah it lets out

this like shrill scream and you see all of the creatures along the walls let out a similar call

and they all begin rushing towards you now

cool development great great they're not going to make it to you this turn with enough time to

be able to attack any of you um but moot yeah where's this guy

okay

i haven't done one of these in a long time middle baby yeah i mean it's basically how they normally

go even when we're like primed and ready so perfect yeah i like that uh hey everybody welcome

back to our and our new episodes if you are caught up it's been forever since we've last

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us page the contact page there's a little sign up form or i'll put a link to it in the

description of this episode that would be cool wouldn't it i'll do that do that all right

here i go i'm gonna go do that you have a great week and finish this episode too yeah you go do

this you find yourself in a white room with a single door i thought for sure you were

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gonna go with like talking heads later i don't know enough of those ones to make it to make

it last um you find yourself in a white room with black curtains cream it's dead okay you

find yourself in a white room there's a little table in the center of it uh with magazines

spread out on top of it a single chair you're like laying on the ground you feel feeling come

back to your to your extremities as you as you sit up and survey this room and you've seen

this room before and there's one door along the wall as you as you sit up and you're able

to see the rest of the room you've seen this room before and it's been a long time since

you've been there you get the distinct sense that beyond that door is a void and in that

void is your patron the great old one who gave you power when there was no power who gave you

an ability when nobody else had that ability what do you do obviously sits down reads a few

magazines they are a few years old of course but yeah they're a little bit uh it's like a time

from 1982 yeah i don't know i mean i've been here before you say yeah yeah well you you

tell me the time frame when you were brought here but you were brought here as your wild

magic was dissipating yeah you were no longer able to really call upon any of your your spells

or incantations um and what for moot what was the the moment when either you connected with

or when you were connected by this entity uh well much like uh this last time it was a pretty

serious surge when i was attempting to use my magic and yeah just kind of woke up here um bit

of a i guess maybe not faustian bargain uh made but something along those lines uh i don't remember

if i waited patiently in the room for something to show up or if i like went to the door or

not so i'll just wait patiently for like a half second just just a scooch of time you wait

patiently for a half second and the door open from beyond there's this cacophonous sound that

you can't put a name or a place or a or even a language to it just fills the room and vibrates

all of the cells within it including within you and you begin to lose like coherence

like coherent thought as your vision goes blurred and then in the next second it's cleared

and there's a a humanoid figure sitting across from you in another chair what does this person

look like oh okay white hair dark skin kind eyes and then the rest of their

features like their body it's kind of like you can tell it's some sort of illusion it

doesn't quite look right but like they really got the like the face and the head

done properly on this and what's their name

or the name that they gave you at the very least oh that's a great question

anybody have a good name idea

i was just gonna say that's just a collection of sounds but all words are just collections of

sounds so i retract my essentially what they are yeah that's right i did it you don't have

to take that name i was just in jasper so the only thing in my head is athabasca

heard so much about athabasca oh i'm into it athabasca 100 athabasca is staring at you

with their kind eyes and as their image kind of like blurs in and out before you

they say well it's pleasure to see you again moot it's been a while um have you

come to make good with your arrangement or what brings you back uh well i kind of felt when

you took my hand we were good was that not the case well i mean we took your hand and gave

you ability to to survive in the world that you exist in knowing that you would be heralding

a new rise for followers of and he says a name that is just incomprehensible to you

to you even at this point but you know exactly what he's saying but could not repeat it

well see it kind of happened again with surge oh he's still using the the the the littlest magic

then i mean when i mean yeah you're not noticed you haven't been calling upon quite as frequently

is there something that that we've done to upset you uh no no uh everything's been there's

been a lot of talking lately every there's been a lot of planning right and a lot of like

jumping around so there hasn't been super duper amounts of time to just

let out that fun magic but um yeah kind of in a bit of a pickle here being here and all my

friends uh being back wherever we were in that weird moist cave oh oh so you've

so you've come for another favor then well i mean not purposefully but yes i guess i have the heart

wants what the heart wants then mood well you're not wrong there wait you don't want my heart do

you not yet that's gonna make it pretty hard for me to be of any use yes not yet

not yet okay we can put it on like a layaway plan

and we cut back to the cave sully you fired an arrow uh tentacles are moving about the the cave

they are enormous coming up and out of this uh out of this vat uh coming in from from

somewhere behind the brain you see now moving in these smaller beaked brain creatures with

tiny spindly tentacles there's probably about six of them that have now entered this space

there's these weird like calling calling sounds coming from them as they are churning up

like the anger inside of these these soft clawed creatures this is really just this is

so good isn't it um for him it's going great it's going great things are going swell yeah

it's a goth turn great roll it roll it do it can i can i yell like a helpful word

uh what like to be you know like the help like can i help can i somehow help help with uh

don't know i'm just you know just trying desperately not necessarily bardic inspiration

i'm not a bard i know just like that's it you can gain advantage on the next ability check it

makes to perform the task so yeah i'll leave it up to you as to whether or not that's something

that we can retroactively put something in to say that you screamed out help so what do you

do to help well i just want to like be really motivational just be like uh your horse did a lot

over there yeah you you can you can too i got you got this

okay we'll give you we'll give you advantage for sully's inspirational motivational speech

oh just so moving and right i mean i cannot find his voice tonight i think i'm struggling so hard

what'd you do two fours i have two fours on these dice

i have one more of that feature can i use it again of course you can do i get advantage on

the second run too sure well let's see how you roll on the first one really rough because

you've got minus one i'm basically re oh i've rolled both dice at once um yeah uh first one's

a 17 so 16 roll it again seven okay you see like a goth like straining against this like

as much as they can tense their muscles and like trying to what i picture is like with

sully's call like a goth like is lying on their back and then like flops over

it's now on their face oh my god so just like just briefest briefest muscle spasm

little fish flop out of water yeah when when you said i wouldn't have to talk

that much for us this isn't exactly what i was picturing but this is not at all what any of

us were picturing for this one i was like what do you do with several high level like level

you can just take them immediately immediately count on us to roll terribly and then that's

the show folks and kill us off one by one at that movement a tentacle attack is going to come

towards sully from the giant brain 15 to attack you it doesn't do it okay tentacle just swings

by your head oh i'm so like i like limbo out of the way i'm like get me faster than that

one of the mind flayers is going to try to nope it's not going to do that we're back to glim oh

so i try and get out of it at the end of my turn you are out of it remember

no no but i'm mind controlled i need to try and get oh yeah the mind control at the end

of the turn no you can move yeah no i can only silly yeah yeah i just don't okay do you want

me to do it i can do it no i'll do it okay it was closest to me which of my beloved friends

is close moon's gone sully's sully's probably closest sully is active i am there is also

matamar and agoth i feel like he's just a little teen i can't you would probably go

for the biggest risk and i'm the only one moving at this point so it makes sense

yeah come at me bro actually like he doesn't say that now one

one more attack and it was a three yes glim what are you doing bad rules as i'm like

like flail my sword i think you're confused you're supposed to hit the big brain thing

not me you're swinging i think you're broken is it an intelligence to get out of it or

charisma be cool you're not cool are you no i rolled it too so 14 that's twice as cool

as you were last time though so that's true uh also roll to see if you recharge your fire

fire fire nope low roll real low roll nope i've rolled um all of my dice are going in jail

i'm gonna be out of this is my last d20 that isn't in jail right now so so you've one d20

left is what you're saying that has not yet wronged you well i feel like it might be

the first one that wronged me and it got back in the rotation but let's see everybody uh celly

i'll give you one more turn but everybody who comes up here so Flamikins kins agoth mademar

and racks uh roll a the intelligence save to see if you die not die uh are are able to

break the incapacity persons like i don't want to be on this podcast anymore right

16 minus one okay and racks mademar and Flamikins kins both failed racks got an 11 okay the scene

plays out as the troglodytes the the soft clawed creatures are are are screaming down

towards your group sully you're being swung at by glim all of you are lying incapacitated on

the ground as these new creatures are entering and tentacles are are swinging down towards your

incapacitated bodies there's this brilliant flash of like electric light and moot you're

hovering above the brain in the center of this room as like these this lightning is like

firing off of you and everything turns its attention to you and you now have two competing

voices in your head moot you have the the voice of the brain in this room who is yelling

not necessarily at you or to you but you you can you can tap into the communication that's

being sent across to all of these other creatures and you also hear the incoherent

language for lack of a better term of the great old one who has given you like this

blast of energy that ripples out around the room briefly stunning the creatures in the room

while at the same time releasing your friends from their paralysis that's been holding them

for the last 18 seconds

Dumbgeons and Dragons Season 2 Episode 121 Starring Amy More as Sullivan Sleight,

Carla Maxted as Glim, Tom Laird as Moot, Kristen Flemmons as a Goth, and Russ More

as your Dungeon Master. Editing, Production, and Sound Design by Russ More. This episode

featured music from Epidemic Sound and sound effects from Epidemic Sound, Boom Library,

and Sound Ideas. A huge thank you to our supporting producers, Gabriel Lynch,

Jessica Babyok, Cat Water Flame, Jacob Madden, Christian Brown, Devin Michaels, Craig Zeiss,

Aaron Stevens, Darylith, Lulahan, L.A. Branton, and Nathaniel Teeter. To support

Dumbgeons and Dragons and our many other productions and get access to an exclusive

podcast called The Adventures Of, bonus episodes, and much more, please join our Patreon

at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast you can also follow us at facebook.com slash dumb

dragon podcast and on instagram and twitter at dumb dragon cast thank you for listening

have a great week we'll talk again soon it's gone it's gone forever

it's fine if you can't find it you can't do it sucka that's right that's how it works

that's how dnd works that's how it works and that's where the episode ends

Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production